I am not a self-conscious teenager. I am an accomplished woman at the end of her middle age. And still, sometimes I find myself sinking into self-loathing. I try not to say things about myself that are negative – either in public or, more importantly, in private. Those niggling thoughts and words we say to ourselves about ourselves are the most destructive. The most damaging to our psyche.
Today, I was at the gym doing legs and started to look at the “fat” on the crook of my bent elbow. I had never noticed it before. I had never noticed “elbow fat”.
So I started to obsess on my elbow “fat” which of course led to obsessing about the other areas of my body. The back fat and the fat on the bottom half of the stomach and the fat on each side of my bra strap. I knew those areas of fat intimately. But elbow fat? Really?
And then I stopped.
Is this a me thing? Is this a woman thing? Either way, it’s got to stop.
There are enough negative messages in the world out there. Enough things saying you are the wrong color. The wrong age. The wrong body type. Not woman enough. Not thin enough. Not wealthy enough. Not enough, period. I certainly don’t need to join in that chorus.
So, in the middle of my workout, I pause to correct myself and created my personal self-affirmation:
I am loved – by me.
I am beautiful – to me.
I AM enough.
And no one gets to tell me I am less than all that.
Even if that someone is me.